Preparing for Your GP Appointment
This guide does not replace medical advice. Its purpose is to help you communicate clearly with your GP so they can make the best decision for your care.
Getting a referral for an autism or ADHD assessment starts with one conversation. This guide helps you make the most of it — what to say, what to bring, and what to do if things don't go as planned.
Why preparation matters
A standard GP appointment is around 10 minutes. Neurodivergent traits are often invisible, inconsistent, or hard to explain on the spot. Without specific examples and clear language, GPs may not realise how significant the impact is — or how long it has been going on.
Preparation is not about exaggerating. It is about helping your GP understand your reality clearly so they can make the best decision for your care.
Neurodevelopmental conditions are specialist areas. Your GP relies on what you tell them to decide whether to refer.
"I struggle" is vague. "I have missed three deadlines this month because I cannot start tasks" is actionable.
You have lived with this. Your experience is valid evidence. This guide helps you put it into words.
Before the appointment
Spend 15–30 minutes writing notes before you go. Focus on real examples, not general feelings.
1. Document specific examples
Think of 3–5 recent, concrete situations that show the impact clearly.
- What happened? (not "I struggled", but "I stood in the supermarket for 20 minutes unable to make a decision and left without buying anything")
- When did it happen? (dates or approximate timeframes help)
- How often does something like this occur?
- What was the consequence? (missed work, damaged relationships, financial impact, physical symptoms)
2. Note how long this has been happening
- Can you remember similar difficulties at school or as a child?
- Has it always been there, but masked or managed?
- Did something change recently that made it harder to cope?
3. Note the impact on key areas
- Work or education — deadlines missed, performance issues, disciplinary action, burnout
- Relationships — difficulty keeping friendships, misunderstandings, conflict
- Daily life — routines, sleep, finances, eating, personal care
- Mental health — anxiety, low mood, exhaustion from masking
4. Mention family history if relevant
- Is there a parent, sibling, or child already diagnosed with autism, ADHD, or a related condition?
- Genetic links are clinically relevant and can support a referral
What to say
You do not need to diagnose yourself. You simply need to describe your experience clearly and ask for help. These phrases are a starting point — adapt them to your own situation.
"I've been struggling with [attention / social communication / sensory overload / executive function] for a long time, and it is significantly affecting my daily life. I'd like to talk about whether a neurodevelopmental assessment might be appropriate."
Keep it focused. You don't need to use the words "autism" or "ADHD" — describe the experience and let the GP draw their own conclusions, or ask directly if you prefer.
"On my worst days, [specific example]. This has been happening for [X years/months] and is affecting [work / relationships / mental health]."
Concrete, recent examples carry far more weight than general descriptions. Mention consequences wherever possible.
"I'd like to be referred for a neurodevelopmental assessment, please. I understand I may have the Right to Choose which NHS-funded provider carries it out — could we discuss that?"
In England, the Right to Choose scheme means you can often choose a faster NHS-funded provider. See the section below for more on this.
"I understand this might not seem immediately obvious in a short appointment, but I've been documenting these difficulties over time. Could I leave you my written notes so you can review them?"
Staying calm and factual is more effective than showing frustration, even when it is justified.
What to ask for
- A formal referral for a neurodevelopmental assessment — ask for this specifically
- The name of the service you are being referred to — so you can follow up if you hear nothing
- The expected waiting time — so you know what is normal for your area
- What to do while waiting — some areas offer interim support or mental health services
Ask your GP: "Can I exercise my Right to Choose for this referral?" You can find accredited providers at NHS.uk.
If your GP dismisses you
Unfortunately, it happens. Neurodivergent conditions — particularly in women, girls, and adults diagnosed later in life — are frequently missed or dismissed. Here is what you can do.
- Keep a diary between appointments — document specific incidents, dates, and impact. A month of written examples is harder to dismiss than a 10-minute verbal description.
- Return with more evidence — bring school reports, work emails, feedback from a partner or close friend who has witnessed the difficulties.
- Ask to see a different GP — you are entitled to see another doctor at the same practice. Some GPs are more experienced with neurodevelopmental conditions than others.
- Put your request in writing — write a letter or email to the surgery formally requesting a referral. Use our letter template as a starting point.
- Contact PALS — the Patient Advice and Liaison Service (PALS) is a free NHS service that helps patients who feel they have not been listened to. Every NHS trust has one. Search "[your area] PALS" to find yours.
- Consider a private assessment — if NHS access is consistently blocked, a private diagnosis can still provide official documentation for workplace and school adjustments.
If this is for your child
The same principles apply, but there are a few additional things to consider.
- Bring school feedback — teacher reports, SENCO observations, or any written notes from school staff carry significant weight with GPs
- Describe behaviour at home vs. school — many children mask intensely at school and "crash" at home. This contrast is clinically important
- Ask the school SENCO to write a supporting letter — a SENCO letter alongside a GP referral request significantly strengthens the case
- Request referral to CAMHS (Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services) for children under 18 — or ask about your local community paediatrics service
- You do not need a formal diagnosis to access school support — schools can put SEN support in place without a diagnosis. Ask the SENCO about this while you wait
Quick checklist
Before your appointment, make sure you have covered these points. You can print this page or take a screenshot.
- Written list of 3–5 specific examples with dates
- How long the difficulties have been happening
- Which areas of life are affected (work, relationships, daily tasks, mental health)
- Any relevant family history of neurodivergent conditions
- Supporting documents if available (school reports, work emails, partner's observations)
- The phrase: "I'd like to request a referral for a neurodevelopmental assessment"
- Ask about the Right to Choose (England) if applicable
- Ask for the name of the service and expected wait time